


Gone

by hitonito



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adora (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Adora having a meltdown, Emotional Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, Literally just wanted to write Adora losing it on Glimmer and Bow because they Don't Get It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:33:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26554414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hitonito/pseuds/hitonito
Summary: This is just a little one-off inspired by chellethewriter's fic, anachronism. I'm a glutton for punishment so I kinda wanted to explore what Adora's grief would look like and I really just wanted her to lash out at everyone for not being able to understand her pain. This is set somewhere between the events in Chapter 11, while the whole gang is prepping to head to Mystacor and shortly before Shadow Weaver confronts Adora. If you haven't read chelle's fic, you should definitely do that first, I'd hate to spoil anything and it's a great read.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra), mentioned Bow/Glimmer
Comments: 10
Kudos: 151





	Gone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chellethewriter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chellethewriter/gifts).
  * Inspired by [anachronism](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25209532) by [chellethewriter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chellethewriter/pseuds/chellethewriter). 



> Haven't done one of these before but I was feeling inspired and I love angsty Catradora so here we go. I've probably bungled a few details but let's just pretend any mistake is intentional and it still makes sense in the timeline. Also, for the sake of this fic, future Adora and Catra have children.

Everyone was busy preparing for the trip to Mystacor, chattering idly and catching up, sounding far too happy. Adora sat at the edge of camp, staring at nothing and petting Melog absently. She hadn't spoken to anyone since trying to tell Entrapta how to disable the chips and she'd explained only briefly that they would need to use the Heart of Etheria to defeat Prime. 

Glimmer and Bow were trying to be sympathetic, trying to help her with a sorrow they couldn't possibly understand. To them, Catra had been their enemy. For some reason, things on Prime's ship had derailed so even the slight bond that Glimmer and Catra were supposed to have started to develop never did. They still saw her as nothing more than a Horde commander, albeit one that Adora had been close with once.

Adora didn't know how to explain and didn't have the energy to try.

Beyond the vague information she'd given them on the way back from Prime's ship, she had no desire to rehash everything again. She knew it was a lost cause and she was resigning herself to the fact that no one would understand. A small part of her thought that it didn't matter, since she was likely going to be dead soon anyway. A smaller part was thankful for that, because at least that meant she wouldn't have to keep living in a world where Catra wasn't.

"Adora."

Adora was pulled from her dark thoughts by the soft sound of Bow's voice from behind her. She sighed and stopped petting Melog, for the first time realizing just how dark they had turned and how deeply sad their eyes were, reflecting her pain back at her.

"What, Bow."

Bow flinched at her tone but for once Adora couldn't bring herself to care. She didn't want to hurt him but she was tired of pretending she had anything to live for anymore.

"We were just hoping you could explain some more about the Failsafe and what will happen when you use it." Adora glanced behind him and found Glimmer just a few feet away, smiling gently at her and gesturing for her to join the rest of them where they were standing around the campfire.

She caught some not-so-subtle glances being thrown her way and let out a long breath from her nose before standing up and nodding to them. She followed Bow and Glimmer, hands tucked in her pockets, and tried to ignore the cautious way that everyone was looking at her. Adora stood slightly away from everyone and looked into the flames, briefly remembering the flame illusion that Catra had jumped into and the stupid, smug way she'd teased her about it afterwards. The pang in her chest made her swallow, looking away and trying to hold back a sudden onslaught of tears.

"Since Entrapta will needs to get to the spire to send the jamming signal to disable the chips, we'll send a strike team to go with her and hold off the Horde's forces. While you're all doing that, I'll sneak into Mystacor. I'll take the tunnels to the Crystal of Arxia and get the Failsafe. Once I have it, I'll go to the Crystal Castle and release the magic in the Heart. With the power boost it provides, we'll be able to take out Prime once and for all." She glossed over the details and noticed Shadow Weaver hovering ominously several paces away, but ignored the chills her stare sent up her spine. She didn't need to tell them that she likely wasn't going to be with them to take out Prime. They would be able to do it without her.

"Are you sure it will work?"

Adora glanced at Glimmer, not liking her tone, "yes," she ground out, fists tightening in her pockets.

Glimmer raised her hands defensively, waving them in surrender as she pressed on."It's not that I doubt you, Adora, I don't. It's just- like you've said, things are different now. If things have changed, can we be sure the Heart will be enough-"

"It will be," Adora growled.

Bow, as always, tried to mediate. He stepped between them and put a hand on their shoulders, looking between them with an optimistic smile. "It'll work, guys. I know it. We'll defeat Prime and then everything will be okay again. We'll get everyone that was chipped back and-"

"Just shut up, Bow." Adora didn't mean for it to slip out, but it did. Bow stopped mid-peptalk, his lower lip trembling slightly as his eyes widened, and Glimmer gaped at her from his other side.

"Adora!"

"No, Glimmer, you shut up too. I'm done listening to this. We'll defeat Prime but everything isn't going to be _'okay.'_ Nothing is ' _okay.'"_

Glimmer's face softened slightly at Adora's obvious anguish as her voice broke over a repressed sob.

She stepped closer and put both hands on Adora's shoulders, looking up at her but still making Adora feel so small. "It will be okay, Adora. I know nothing makes sense now, I know you're hurting. But we can't just give up. I can't imagine that Catra would want you to just let Prime win."

Adora had been coming down, her shoulders slumping in resignation, but the mention of Catra set her off again. She pushed Glimmer and watched with a tiny spark of satisfaction as the queen stumbled backwards and fell in the dirt. 

"You don't get it, Glimmer. I came here, _we_ came here to get Angella back. To help you get _your_ mother back. We spent _years_ trying to build another portal so that your family could be whole again. We came here and were forced to relive our most awful memories, our worst mistakes. We couldn't even fix things this time around for fear that it would completely destroy the future we worked so hard to build! Catra _hated_ _herself_ for the things she did during the war and she had to do them _all over again!_ Every battle, every village destroyed, every single mistake that she worked so hard to make up for, all of it just thrown back in her face!"

Adora was panting, hands balled up so tight her nails started to draw blood, but she couldn't make herself care. She knew she was losing it. Melog was pacing nearby, blood red and growling at air, reflecting her violent emotions back at her.

Bow tried again, stepping closer to her hesitantly as Glimmer stared up at her from the ground, "Adora, please...We know this is hard for you. Obviously we can't understand how much pain you're in, but we know Catra meant a lot to you. We-"

Adora found herself turning on him next, rage bubbling up uncontrollably inside her. " _Your_ wife is still alive." She gestured to the both of them, ignoring how everyone around them was watching with bated breath as they witnessed her complete meltdown. "You two still have your family. You have each other and your children will still be there waiting for you in this future. My wife is _gone._ My _children_ will never exist! My family... My family is broken. You don't get to sit here, with your entire life ahead of you, and tell me that it will get better. My wife is gone and without her...without her, I can't do this. I can't see ten feet in front of me because the future we worked so hard for, the life we built together, everything is just...gone." Her voice broke as she choked on a sob, folding her arms tightly to her chest in a feeble attempt to hold herself together

Unable to stand there any longer with their sad, uselessly sympathetic gazes burning her skin any longer, she turned on her heel and fled to her tent. 

Later, she knew she would have to pull it together and join the others for their journey to Mystacor, but for the moment, she could only wallow in the sick feeling of her hopeless grief.


End file.
